My introduction
Posted by Clicksy | Posted in My blog | Posted on 11-12-2011
Tagged Under : bio, chores, disability, happiness, happy, humanetrics, illness, introduction, laundry, mayo clinic, myers briggs, overcome, overcoming, personality types, positive, ra, rheumatoid arthritis, technology, typelogic
I mentioned previously I was going to try to start writing here. I suppose I should start with a little about myself. That’s a subject I find pretty boring, and if you’re a reader that doesn’t know me, you’ll find it even more boring. But in the context of what I want to write about in the future, I think it will be relevant. This isn’t a very complete bio, but it’s a little background and mostly explains my life as it is today. I like reading a little background on people. Maybe I will get lucky and someone will be interested in reading this one.
My mini-bio
I am a 35 year old female, raised in central Illinois, USA. I’m married to my high school sweetheart, we have an awesome yellow lab and no kids. I have a wonderful family who is very supportive. Overall, I’m a pretty happy person. I’ve had a lot of health problems through the years - nothing too major, but a lot of small challenges that added up.
About 5 months ago I learned that I have rheumatoid arthritis (aka RA). It’s seeming now that I may have had RA since I was a child. I’m sero-negative, which means it doesn’t show up in the standard RA tests. Most people that are sero-negative only find out when the symptoms become overwhelmingly obvious. Currently I’m in a ‘flare’ that involves nearly all of my joints. This is why I’m able to finally take the time to sit down and write. It’s also the reason I haven’t updated any animations recently - I can’t stay in the same position too long, like at a computer chair, or I start to get stiff and my joints swell.
It’s exciting in the sense that many of these problems I’ve had through the years (particularly migraines and fibromyalgia) are probably directly related to RA, and now that I know, they can potentially improve - maybe even dramatically. My fatigue has already improved with beginning RA treatment. Despite the pain, I have more frequent bursts of energy and I’m thinking more clearly. I never had any idea of the extreme that fatigue was affecting my life, dulled my thoughts, and strained my interactions with other people.
This isn’t intended to be an arthritis blog. But I think it would be good to eventually point out some things I’ve found that are helpful, so those that need it can find it through search engines. It’s also a big part of my life right now. Many of my thoughts and recent experiences come about as a direct result of RA. Some things that are surprising, funny, and frequently, unexpected. I should also note, I don’t expect or want pity or condolences. RA sucks, but there are much worse things in life. I am happy despite my newly discovered limitations. I’ll expand on that a little below.
When I was about 12, I had a doctor tell me to learn anything I could that would allow me to work from home. I’ve tried to heed his advice through the years, but also rebelled against it. I’ve worked pretty consistently outside of the home. I’ve also done a lot of consulting, tutoring and bartering on my own. My interests are very wide, but not too deep. The term ‘jack of all trades, master of none’ has always been a favorite. I love learning and fixing things. If you were to ask me what my area of expertise was, I would have to say that I’m pretty good at research. I like figuring things out and taking what I’ve learned and applying it to different areas of my life and work. I may get more specific on work experiences later, especially in regards to my time at a home for the disabled and the technology aspects of some of the things I’ve done more recently.
My goals
My first goal, for my life and with this blog, is to learn to share more, to be more open with people, and to do it on a regular basis. I’ve always been a kind of reserved person when it comes to my private thoughts – except with family and a few friends. There are a lot of reasons for that, which I’m starting to understand more, but that’s a different blog post. I’ve started to think about sharing in broader terms. Some of my favorite memories, of things I’ve learned and experiences I’ve had, are only there because people chose to share. They’ve let others into their lives. So I am going to try and share some things I’ve learned. No specific subject, just anything I find interesting, funny, amusing, or my favorite: different. I hope others will be open to share their thoughts and opinions as well, and we can all learn from each other. Because I plan on being totally random instead of neat, ordered and focused on a single subject, I will try and create my titles based on subject and tag each post appropriately.
My second goal is to be positive and proactive. In regards to sharing, maybe you hesitate to share because you don’t agree with me and don’t want to start an argument. But I think debate is healthy, and can be a very positive experience (can you tell I’m not in politics?). If you agree with me, great. If you don’t, and you don’t tell me, how can I learn? I’m very good at changing my mind, I always to try and play devil’s advocate in my head. There are a lot of good reasons to be positive. For me, it’s mostly because it’s just more fun and makes me a happier person - and it makes the people around me happier.
My third goal is to be different. This is very closely related to my first goal of sharing, because I wouldn’t describe myself as a very sharing person in regards to my private life and thoughts. This is also closely related to my second goal - I’m trying to take the things I see as negative in my life and make them different by being positive and proactive.
I relate these goals to many areas of life, and they work well together. They’re simple to remember throughout the day. Some days I do pretty good, some days are harder, but all that’s important is that I’m trying my best. I should also mention, making new animations is also a goal, but it’s more of a long term goal… I’ll get there.
My dirty laundry
Choosing a silly random example of how I am applying these goals to my life… say I’m trying to do laundry. When RA flares, simple things can be very frustrating. For instance, when I lean down to pick up a basket and find it’s too straining on my joints to carry it, my first reaction is to get angry. Maybe my clumsy swollen fingers will slip and drop things. I think about how I’ve never had that problem before, about how everything is harder now, about how much longer it will take me, about how it will inevitably hurt, and about how sick I am of it all. It doesn’t last long, but lots of these short and angry gut reactions through the day tend to add up – and I don’t want them.
I’m trying to recognize when I do that, stop myself, and be different, positive, and proactive. Sure, it will take me longer, but it’s laundry. It doesn’t matter if I don’t do it right now, or if I can’t do it quickly. I have to learn what I can do in this strange and new body, so it’s also a learning experience. The laundry is just like any other problem, all I have to do is look for the solution. I’m not building the pyramids here…
I’ll use two baskets to make them lighter to carry. I’ll have to make two trips, but that’s okay because movement is important for RA (it helps break up the swelling that settles in the joints during inactivity). As I separate the loads and take the baskets to the laundry room, I pay special attention. I try to remember how I hold the basket and move, what hurts and what doesn’t (straining joints can damage them and cause pain and swelling). I pay special attention to my fingers and spine, these are areas that are affected the most for me right now and they’re very important to protect. I make sure not to bump my tender joints (I had no idea I was so clumsy, I just didn’t notice when I bumped into things).
Now, not only did I get the laundry done, I accomplished something much more important - learning to live and do daily tasks with RA. Laundry is fun now! All kinds of chores are fun, I’ve even started baking again. I can’t do them quickly, but I can do them just as well as anyone. RA is not the end of the world, it’s just a stepping stone.
My rebellious happiness
If you’ve ever had to study up on a medical issue, especially your own, I’m sure you understand this. It’s all doom and gloom. They don’t tell you the good stuff. There are plenty of good things and I’m gonna find em, and I’ll even tell you about some of them here.
Don’t believe me? Here’s one of the first things I discovered after this flare knocked me on my butt: I have time to do all those little things I’ve always wanted to do. I just went through my entire (paper) picture collection. It took me a few days but it’s all sorted in neat little Tupperware.
I bet you wish you had a neat and organized picture collection.
My Jetsons fantasy
I’m using some of this down time to learn about a lot of other things that are different and new to me. I’m particularly interested in this technology and internet age boom we have, and how most businesses and schools are still using models from the early 1900s or before. We wonder why so many of these things are failing in today’s society, but it doesn’t occur to most of us that we can, and should, change them to fit with today’s technology and today’s shorter attention spans.
The shorter attention spans is something I’ve been looking into as well, I plan on posting on that soon. It’s in the thinking stage, but relates strongly to the technology we have today. A good example is kids in the average public school. They have all kinds of high tech gadgets and devices, they are the kings of multitasking. We ask them to go to school and sit at a desk for eight hours - and then we wonder why we have so many kids diagnosed with ADD. I believe a large part of that problem is because the model that most teachers and schools are using is designed for the way kids were a hundred years ago. We’ve grown as a species, and we need to teach our children in a way that engages them, using all the tools and technology we have available now. It’s all about the Jetsons, baby!
My tired fingers
Anyway, that’s enough for one post. It actually took me weeks to come up with how to approach this introductory post. Then I had to write it in short spurts because of the RA. I wanted to be thorough and explain myself, but do so in a way that’s also somewhat brief. I hope I’ve accomplished that. You can expect to see more frequent posts here, that will probably be much more brief and hopefully entertaining and educational. I also plan on including a lot of links and media below and within each post. The links below are pretty general to this theme, but appropriate I think.
RELATED RESOURCES:
Everything’s amazing and nobody’s happy: A short interview on Conan O’Brien’s show with comedian Louis CK. I think of this interview often, I can closely relate to what he’s saying. It has helped me to be more amazed and a happier person.
TED: TED stands for Technology, Education, and Design. They have conferences with amazing speakers on a wide variety of subjects. I’ll reference these talks frequently in the future. The speeches are generally under 20 minutes, some are much shorter, but I’ve found every single talk amazing. I find myself researching their ideas and inadvertently mimicking what I learn from them. Hopefully it’s true what they say, “imitation is the purest form of flattery.” A few years ago I might have said, “there’s nothing new under the sun.” But after watching so many videos on the site, I’ve decided that the saying ridiculously false. There is plenty out there that is new and, oh boy, is it cool! This is one of my very favorite sites.
Aimee Mullins and her 12 pairs of legs: An inspiring woman discusses how she looks at her limitations and “disability” differently.
Gabe Zichermann: How games make kids smarter: A lot of my ideas on education were spawned from this talk, and others that I intend to discuss later. It gets more into the specifics of multitasking.
Stacy Kramer, the best gift I ever survived: A short (3 min or so) talk from a woman who is incredibly inspiring and has helped me remember to see the good through the bad.
Even Ensler, suddenly my body: (slightly NSFW) The writer of the Vagina Monologues gives an inspiring speech in regards to our relationships with our bodies.
Humanetrics personality test: So much of who we are is related to our ‘personality type’. Here is an easy test to help you determine yours. No gimmics, you don’t have to share your email or sign up for anything, it’s just a tool to learn about who you are. This type of test is based on science, it’s not one of those hoakey things, it’s real psychology type stuff. I’ve tested as a strong INTJ type, but I suspect that’s changing… gonna take the test soon and find out.
The basics of Myers-Briggs types: This is a great resource to learn about MB typing, what it is, how it works, and how we can apply it to our everyday lives.
TypeLogic personality type descriptions: This site explains each personality type in more specific terms.
Mayo Clinic’s rheumatoid arthritis page: The straight dope, if you’re interested, and if you’re like I was… totally clueless about RA.
RA forums at Daily Strength: A community resource for those that are more personally affected by rheumatoid arthritis themselves, or through a friend or family member. Members ask and answer questions, which is incredibly helpful when you’re trying to learn the specifics.
HealingWell RA forums: The same as above, just a different community.